Can YOU Relate?

I know all of these quotes came out of my mom's mouth on more than one occasion! I know we passed them along to our kids, too.



1. *My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE*.

"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."



2. *My mother taught me RELIGION*.

"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."



3. *My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL*.

"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"



4. *My mother taught me LOGIC*.

" Because I said so, that's why."



5. *My mother taught me MORE LOGIC*.

"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."



6. *My mother taught me FORESIGHT*.

"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."



7. *My mother taught me IRONY*.

"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to really cry about."



8. *My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS*.

"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."



9. *My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM*.

"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"



10. *My mother taught me about STAMINA*.

"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."



11. *My mother taught me about WEATHER*.

"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."



12. *My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY*.

"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"



13. *My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE*.

"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."



14. *My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION*.

"Stop acting like your father!"



15. *My mother taught me about ENVY*.

"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."



16. *My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION*.

"Just wait until we get home."



17. *My mother taught me about RECEIVING*.

"You are going to get it when you get home!"



18. *My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE*.

"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."



19. *My mother taught me ESP*.

"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"



20. *My mother taught me HUMOR*.

"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."



21.. *My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT*.

"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."



22. *My mother taught me GENETICS*.

"You're just like your father."



23. *My mother taught me about my ROOTS*.

"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"



24. *My mother taught me WISDOM*.

"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."



And my favorite:



25. *My mother taught me about JUSTICE*.

"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you.